Arizona Green Tea Bedroom

My daughter wanted her room painted differently. We moved in about 5 years ago and I painstakingly painted each kids room exactly how they wanted. They are really cool rooms! But she was in the third grade then, and now she’s 13 in the eighth. Even I have to admit the room was too young and princessy for her. Jazz's Old Room

But, for the past three years, I had a crappier paying job than I had when we moved in and I couldn’t afford our bills, let alone to re-do her room. But now I have the best job ever, and I have more time and money to do things, so I asked her how she wanted her room done. All I could say to her response was:

Not ImpressedReally?

 

Arizona Green Tea. That. Was her answer.

And so it began.

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And the finale!!! At least for the mural part…

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As if that wasn’t enough, we decided that the carpet in her room needs to go! So we did this!

 

This is some serious girl power! Tomorrow we lay down the laminate and we will feel like the baddest bitches in town! Please hit me up if you want to commission a mural of your own! Maybe a giant Sun Rise Sushi Logo or your favorite sports team logo in the living room! Er, uhhh, I mean the man cave?  Go to my Murals page for pricing. Updates on the floor soon to come!

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Choices Part 3

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Image taken from the artforadults Instagram page. Not my work.

Several previous posts have outlined the events that have lead up to the mess my life is in right now. None of it is pretty, lots of it makes me ashamed. I am stagnant and depressed. I keep saying I have no hope, but if I didn’t, then I wouldn’t be writing this, I wouldn’t even try to get up in the morning and the dreams I have would go away and leave me alone. It’s been brought to my attention that I have choices. I CAN change my life no matter how impossible it seems. I NEED to change my life, or at least my outlook on the life I have. I have always gone where the wind blew me, until it blew me into pregnancy and marriage, which seem like a dark corner where the gusts can’t reach and so I stay here damp and rotting till someone comes with a broom and sweeps me out. The thing is, I don’t want to depend on anyone with a broom! I want to sweep myself out! Maybe not even out of marriage, and certainly not out of motherhood, but out of this stagnant depression, this groundhog day like existence of doing the same things day in and day out. Get up, take kids to school, go to work, come home, eat, help with homework, go to bed and do it five days a week and then clean and prepare all weekend for the next week to be exactly the same. My life isn’t horrible. I have three beautiful kids who love me, a husband who cares deeply for me, a job that pays the bills and feeds us all even if just barely, a car, clean running water, this computer, all things that most of the world doesn’t have and many yearn for. It’s absolutely unfulfilling, boring and enslaving. I have no time or money to LIVE. I only exist and I MUST do something about that. So here I plan to list my dreams, plans to make them happen, obstacles to overcome, pros and cons of each including the effects they may have on my family, in the hopes of being able to choose a pathway to freedom and happiness, or at least less depression. getting them all in order is going to be tough, so please bear with me as I struggle.

 

When I think of the ultimate happy life for myself from this point on, this is what it looks like:

I could somehow magically quit my job and still pay my bills, no, pay them completely off except maybe the mortgage and I could stay home while my husband worked at whatever amazing job has magically presented itself.

I would still have to wake up Monday morning at the ungodly hour of 6:00am to take my daughter to school, but once I got home and saw my boy off, I could start laundry, do dishes, clean the downstairs and then the upstairs. In the summer, I’d tend my garden before cleaning the house, before things got too hot. That all should take maybe two hours. Then I would shower and dress and shop for the week. I’d get home, unpack groceries and head upstairs to Blog for the remaining two hours before it was time to pick up my daughter from school. We’d come home and I’d help kids with homework before starting dinner. We would eat, and clean up together, then I’d either hang out with them or go upstairs and read articles and watch vlogs on how to homestead, permaculture, how to raise animals for food, how to build treehouses, how to navigate the art business…

Tuesdays, up at 6:00am, off to school, home, garden, clean, shower, then go to some art studio like The Generator for four hours to work on some massive project till it was time to pick up my girl. Then home, homework, dinner, clean up, and hang with kids or watch more vlogs and read more articles on beekeeping and woodworking and outdoor survival…

Wednesdays, 6:00am, school, home, garden, clean, shower, Generator for art, school, home…well, you get the idea. All that till I could accumulate a big enough body of work to show my art at as many events, galleries and contests as possible up to and including Burning Man. Hopefully that would allow me to make more money and connect with people who could actually show me how to do all the things I have been trying to learn about through blogs, vlogs and articles. I would be able to keep up with housework and homework as well as having my own time to do the art, building and gardening work I’m passionate about. I would have time to plan the healthy meals which I love to find and prepare for my family. I would make meals and snacks that I know would help heal their minds, bodies and spirits as well as my own. We would use essential oils and other 100% natural products to clean our home and treat ailments and keep us healthy. I would have the TIME and money and energy to decorate and prepare for holidays and vacations. I would have TIME to clean up after our adventures and get the home back in order. On weekends I could afford to take the time and money to go on adventures with the family and bring them to my shows and exhibitions.

With the money I’d make from my art I would continue to fix this house up. I’d be able to put new floors in, update to energy saving appliances, make the murals and decorate the rooms the way I envisioned them. I could finish the ocean mural in my friend’s home and all the other projects I’ve started for friends but haven’t had the time or energy to finish. Once it was all done, I’d stay for two years enjoying it, making art, making connections and getting the kids through school as happy and healthy as we can be within this system and within this marriage.

Then we would sell this house and buy unimproved land somewhere and build ourselves a homestead where we could get EVERYTHING we need from our own land and be independent of the system except for property taxes, insurance, and the smallest necessities needed from town or other homesteaders. We’d go to music festivals and sell our wears and grow our own meat and veggies. I KNOW it’s not impossible! I can SEE people out there DOING it!

 

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Again, not my image. Taken from Instagram username wendyortizart.

 

All of that is how I WISH things could go from now till then. But where is the money going to come from? I have to face the fact that my husband is probably never going to get a job that could support us all and provide enough money to actually live life like that. No one is going to just GIVE us money to make that happen, and I’m not sure I’d even want them to. I hate feeling DEPENDENT on anyone. I hate being dependent on my husband for his half of the contribution to everything right now. I don’t want to ever feel obligated to anyone except those less fortunate than me. Maybe this hang-up with obligation is why I have a hard time opening up to my husband physically. I hate that I feel obligated and that it’s not my own not passionate choice in that moment, especially since there is only a small window of time between other obligations to get it done. I also HATE going to work outside my home and having to bend my family’s life around it. My kids are alone far too much of the time. I just don’t see any way around it. I make art whenever there are no other obligations and there is time before bed or I can afford to stay up and work when the inspiration is there. That happens maybe once a month, if even that. But I still do it and I will hopefully be able to come up with a consistent body of work at some point. Right now it feels like it’ll never happen. I’m struggling to come up with any kind of plan to make even small parts of this lifestyle come to be. Here are things I think I should do:

Meal plan on weekends and give a list of groceries to my husband. I don’t do the shopping, but maybe I should start doing that on weekends. He would scream about the bill, but maybe I can get him to trade the mortgage bill I pay, for the grocery bill he pays and then I wouldn’t have to answer to him for the amount of money it takes to feed a family of five an abundantly healthy diet. I’m not sure I’d even have the money or energy to pull that off, but I can look into it. I don’t get home till almost 7:00pm and I still have to help kids with homework, so he does most of the cooking and I’d have to depend on him to stick to the meal plan. Sometimes he’s not home till late either and then it’s even harder, but I enjoy cooking, and if we are eating right, the kids might not have as much trouble in school and I might be able to spend less time having to help them. I have no idea when we’d have time to fix up healthy snacks that so often require putting together instead of just opening a plastic package, but we can try…

I need to make a budget. How much we make vs. how much goes out. I already know it’s pathetic. I’ve done it before and got scared, so I put it out of my mind and hoped for the best. I need a PLAN for paying off all this debt that wasn’t a problem when I was getting paid a lot more. I can’t ignore it anymore. I MUST put in more effort to stay on top of my bills. I must get my money organized. I need to accept the possibility of bankruptcy or at least call the creditors and ask  for options to lessen the burden. When I think about this I get terrified. I’m no good on the phone even with friends and family. Seriously, the phone SCARES me. I know it’s irrational and after I do take care of something like that I feel better, but I’m literally terrified of paperwork and legal stuff and talking to people on the phone, or asking for help, or accepting defeat and fault. But it’s time to suck it up and act like the adult/parent that I am.

I need to stop complaining and be grateful. My kids aren’t sick, my husband isn’t sick. I am sick, but it’s fatigue and depression, not some life threatening, expensive hospitalizing disease. I CAN still get up in the morning and I CAN still go to work, I CAN still help the kids with homework and let them vent and talk to me about whatever they need. No matter how much I want change and adventure, no matter how much I resent my life as it is now, I DO have a lot of things to be grateful about.

Lastly, I guess I need to ask for help. I don’t know who to ask or how to ask or even really what to ask FOR. Anyway, enough for now. Thanks for reading. Really just typical American woman lifestyle stuff I guess. Advice and encouragement welcome.

 

 

Spring Inspired Jewelry Fashion

I promised in my last post to share my line of spring inspired designs and I know you have all been waiting with baited breath to see them! Here they are in all their wondrous glory!

Blue Flowers

“Blue Flowers” features a beautiful blue diamond set in a sleekly rounded white gold bezel with flower embellishments. It is simple and classy, but oh so eye catching!

Green Diamond Line1

“Green Glory” features a fantastic deep green diamond set in a green gold bezel with green gold flower embellishments.

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I love this ring! From the yellow cushion cut center diamond to the mix of green and white gold, “Sunny Meadows” screams springtime!

Green Diamond Line3

The elegant, clean lines of this mixture of green and rose golds and the use of both the deep green center diamond and the apple green side diamonds make “Primavera Verde” an excellent choice for your spring wardrobe.

Pink Lace

I’ve become a huge fan of combining big luscious pink gems with gorgeous rose gold. “Pink Lace” is just simple enough to be classically elegant, but the large Morganite gemstone and “lacey” gallery make this ring a stunner!

Purple Flowers

Ever seen a purple diamond? Talk about a conversation piece! “Fiori Viola” is a beautiful blend of light and dark purple diamonds in a stylish, wide, rose gold band.

Two Tone Depth Pink

This piece is full of depth and dimension. With an oval cut, bezel set, pink diamond that seems to float within a deep gallery of  rose gold lace frame in white gold, “Fluers en Dentelle” is truly unique and absolutely beautiful.

Two tone depth simple pink

Sometimes less is more, as is the case with “Morning Glory”. It is simple and understated with just enough contrast between the sleek lines of  white gold and the organic curves of rose gold peeking out on either side of the pink center diamond to make it stand out.

Yellow Vine

“Soleil et Vignes” is my absolute favorite! I ADORE Yellow and green. They brighten everything from the room to my mood especially when I see them poking up out of the ground after a long winter! This ring features an oval cut fancy yellow diamond with two K color pear shaped diamond accents set in green gold bezels on a rose gold split shank with green gold vine embellishments. Sigh… I’m so glad spring is here!

For these and many more designs visit http://www.bvwjewelers.com

GD Inspired Jewelry Design

So, today, instead of complaining about my current effed up money situation and general hopelessness, I thought I’d post something I’m grateful for. See, even though the pay kinda sucks for now and the hours are keeping me from home, family and art, I’m actually enjoying my time at this new job and I’m learning a lot about the jewelry business that I wasn’t learning at my previous well-paying but boring and frustrating jeweler’s position. Plus, even though it’s keeping me from painting, drawing, and sculpting, and since they don’t have a laser welder, I can’t do any actual jeweling yet, it is still providing me with a creative outlet. I am learning how to design jewelry digitally on a pretty basic but still awesome program. I have to admit it’s been quite fun! I’ve been using my current obsession with a certain K-Pop Idol “cough..GD..cough” as inspiration.

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He’s such a talented and beautifully creative man and his use of symbols in his work makes inspiration easy. Here are a few of the designs I created with him in mind.Apple Pendant Men's Apple Ring1

The apple on the left is a digital rendering I created with the intent to smooth out the ridges and add some findings to make it into a single dangle earring about 8mm in diameter. This and the one on the right are both symbolic of G-Dragon’s Heartbreaker and Cou D’etat eras with the apple symbol, and the eight flush set diamonds in the shape of a heart. I also had Proverbs 25 in mind while creating these.

Then there are the Evil Eyes! LOL! I’ve never actually seen GD wearing them, but I know he would love them! My new bosses were joking that I’d need an evil eye to ward off their bad influences while working there so I created some! They think I was joking by making them but I was only half joking. I’d totally rock these if I could afford them! What do you guys think of these? Would you wear them?

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Which one is your favorite? I like them all, but I think the last two are my faves and I think the first one is more of a man’s ring, though any of them can be unisex. They are very Boho Chic and Urban Edge if you ask me, and if enough interest is shown, I’d love to make some cool earrings and pendants to match them.

The smiley face ring is self explanatory if you know anything about Mr. Kwon Jiyong, but if you’re not familiar with the Big Bang front-man, here is an explanatory pic and the ring I designed:

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Note the smiley tattoo on his hand :).

Then there’ this androgynous, kinda Urban Industrial looking one that was inspired by rings I’ve seen him wearing before:

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I love this ring so much! The bosses did too and are going to order it to be made up from the manufacturer and we’ll set the diamonds in it to see how it sells. They are also getting a silver prototype of the apple dangle. I kinda wish we could get a gold one, but Reno isn’t exactly the jewelry fashion hub of the world and it will be difficult to sell unless word spreads to bigger markets. A girl can dream right? I mean all I do all day is create! I would love to get some of these ordered for anyone out there in cyberland who wants one. If you do, hit me up at http://www.bvwjewelers.com and we can make that happen. I can modify any of the designs you see here or I could design something from scratch just for you if you prefer. Ask for Jeanette! I would love it if you hit me up on the BVW Jewelers Instagram or Facebook page and look through some of the owner, Britten’s designs. He’s also a seriously talented designer and jeweler. I’m really lucky to be able to learn from him out of all the jewelers in this town. He really is the best and I feel blessed to be there. The harder I work, and the more business I bring them, the more they will be able to pay me and the more I’ll be able to catch up on everything financially. I also have an Instgram page called ARTISTJETTE that I would be honored for you to follow.

I guess I should note that I don’t own any of the images I’ve shared of G-Dragon on this post and he has nothing to do with me or the store I work at except that he truly is an inspiration to me. I would die if he wore any of my designs! You can help me there too by tagging him in my design photos on Instagram till he sees them.

I have more designs that just came from me and were inspired by spring and my own taste in jewelry, but I’ll save those for another post.

Please leave a comment and tell me what you think and which design is your favorite? It would help me know what will sell and what won’t so I know which direction to take my designs. Thanks y’all, you are so special and encouraging to me! Be blessed!